A large white chapel reveals itself sitting on top of a hill in the middle of the Sonora Desert. It looks like a white spike that speared up from the empty ground.
“You want to check it out?”
I hesitate, “I don’t know. Do you?”
“Yes!”
As we exit the off-ramp and hop on a dusty dirt road Fritz notices a man that looks in his early 30’s.
“Look at how red that man’s neck is.”
The sun has raped this man’s neck to blisters. Passing him we shake it off. We pull up to a large sign that resembles one you might see entering a National Park. It reads,
“History In Granite.”
Below, “$5.00 donations – Honor System”
Fritz hops out dropping a five spot in a little yellow box beneath the sign. To our left we see a freestanding spiral staircase two and a half stories high. It leads to nowhere.
“Checkout those stairs.” Fritz’s eyes let me know he wants to climb to the top of them and have his picture taken.
“Fritz it’s surrounded by a gate.”
“I could hop that thing.”
Not a good sign when your road-trip-pal wants to trespass on a crazy staircase in the middle of no-where and we are entering a compound that is a geometric Waco Texas on steroids.
There is symmetry in the positioning of every structure out here. Branch Davidian style buildings run parallel to each other. A sign says apartments for rent.
“Who in their right mind would want to live out here?”
“I am going to pull this beast around, incase we need to leave fast.”
Fritz points the RV toward the highway. We cautiously get out. The air is dry and it’s a fucking ghost town. My ability to conjure words is gone while venturing out. Fritz is wearing a floral skirt, sandals, and nothing else. In front of us are granite walls strategically placed throughout the center of the compound. Inscribed on them are the origins of humanity and the history of civilization. Recordings similar to a Rosetta Stone are all I can compare them to. Encyclopedias on granite tablets are all over the place. I snap shots of Fritz and make my way to the church mound. Leaping up the long plain staircase I get to the chapel. It’s modest compared to most Christian Shrines. Looking down from the top I get a full layout of the land. Fritz is climbing on the center of a crude metal obelisk in the center of the walls. Circling the building I see a square formation of stones with a large granite plaque in the center. It’s a tombstone stating, “This is Consecrated Ground.” The names of their dead dress the polished stone. I snap a picture before heading back down the stairs. Halfway down I look and see the man with the redneck bee-lining toward Fritz. My hands glide over the camera, sliding the memory card into my pocket. I scurry down the stairs toward both of them. Fritz can’t seem to hear me.
“Bro’ its time to leave.”
He is in awe of the granite walls. I head to Hoe-Nay. Mr. Redneck stops me.
“Are you with him.” Pointing at Fritz.
“Yes.”
“Mayor Istel wants to speak to both of you. He owns the town.”
“Town of what? This is a compound.” I say in my head.
By know Fritz notices that I was talking to Mr. Redneck. Hurrying over he asks what he wants.
“He said that the mayor wants to speak with us.”
Fritz cautiously laughs, “the mayor of what?”
Mr. Redneck looks back from where he is sitting pretending he didn’t hear Fritz. Mr. Redneck picks up a tool connected to a generator and starts chiseling away. The question about his redneck is answered.
We walk over to the two major buildings to take a look at the 21-foot granite pyramid in front of the center watchtowers. A sign next to the pyramid states, “This is the center of our world.” What a sweet idea, now my heart is beating in Morse code, “time to go, time to go, time to go.” My wheels keep turning about how rational this is or lack there of. Suddenly I sense people are watching us. We are two slices of Swiss cheese with light beaming through the holes about to melt.
Walking around one of the buildings Fritz notices two men standing on top of a staircase pretending not to notice us. He lets out an echoing whisper.
“Hook around the side.”
We try swiftly avoiding the two men, but then we hear,
“Hello.”
“Hi.”
From around the corner comes a withered Chinese woman. Her skin looks leathery from the Sonora Sun.
“Please come inside.” The witch from Hansel and Gretel has just been given a voice.
“Why?” Fritz replies.
“So we can talk.”
“We can talk out here.” Fritz is not backing down.
“We want to ask you about what you’ve seen here today.”
“We are uncomfortable going inside.” Fritz just throws it out there.
“We want to show you a movie that we show everyone.”
I interject, “Ma’am, we are uncomfortable with that.”
“What are you doing here? Who are you?” She shrieks.
“We thought this was a tourist site from the sign out front. We paid the $5.00 donation.” I say.
Her mood changes like a light switch going off. “That was very kind of you. Thank you.”
She snaps back into berserker mode at Fritz, “Pull down your pants!”
“Why do you want me to pull down my pants?” His skirt sinks past his Abercrombie waist.
We are walking speedily to Hoe-Nay.
She is screaming now. “Just leave. Get out of here! Ahh!”
The two men that were on the staircase we avoided are behind her speed walking at our heels. Jumping into the RV we lock the doors starting her on the first try. Leaving a dust cloud behind us we breathe a sigh of relief. Our hearts are flapping like flags in a hurricane. Then a sign pops up as we hop back on the interstate. “Thank you for visiting the town of Felicity.”
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